Big Decisions

I am facing a lot of really big, important decisions in my life right now. I'm also facing a lot of smaller decisions that still might have a great impact on my life. I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. A friend of mine tells me to have faith and just trust in God's plan. I completely do. That isn't my problem at all. I believe that God has a great plan for me and that all things work together for my good. Most things that are for the best in Him, completely suck to begin with (like facing emotions, people's reactions, etc); however, in the long run they are completely incredible. That's something I'm learning. If something is not from Christ, it generally has pretty awesome short-term benefits, and really bad long-term consequences.

I'm afraid of the future, not because I don't trust God's will for my life, but because I've basically told God that I'm not making the decisions. If He wants me to do something, He has to show me. It's been pretty awesome to see Him actually doing this in my life. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do with my summer until I was nearly handed a summer resident mission position. I didn't have a job last fall when I lost my internship at a local church, but God handed me a job and some amazing new friends. Now, I'm up to grad school/seminary. I know I have plenty of options. I could go to school (Asbury, Duke, Garrett, CIU), I could go straight into the mission field and move to China or Africa, I could stay in town and save money working a few jobs here, I could travel the world...(except that I'm poor).

I am expectant. I am waiting on God. I know that He is working good things in my life. I just have to have faith and trust that in time, He will reveal His will to me. One piece at a time.

Revisions.....?!?

Having grown up in a Christian home, I have been blessed to be surrounded by Christian family for most of my life; however, it was not until later in adolescence that I discovered the true importance of Christ in my life. Growing up, my parents and older brother were my constant encouragement and solid foundation from which my understanding of Christianity grew. I have known from a young age that God is my creator and sustainer and that through Him anything is possible. Growing up in the church, I was active in youth groups, church choirs, vacation Bible schools, and church retreats; I always felt these things fed my soul and taught me more about my faith and the Christian community we find in the body of Christ.

 As a young person, I heard a lot of amazing and inspirational testimonies about how God was at work in other people’s lives, especially during difficult times; I prayed that I, too, would have a great testimony to share as I grew up. My foundation in Christian family greatly prepared me to face one of the hardest times in my life which became an important part of my own testimony. During middle school, I was diagnosed with clinical depression. This depression separated me from feeling the love of Christ, as well as those around me. My poor self image and feelings of lack of control over my life led me to feelings of anxiety and self-mutilation. It was only through regular encounters with friends in the Church that I was able to see that I am a unique part of God’s creation and He loves me as His child. I learned that Christ is my strength and my foundation; and, through Him, anything is possible. This part of my testimony is one that God has used continuously in my life to connect me with my brothers and sisters who are hurting or struggling through hardships like my own. Although it was a difficult time in my life, it has helped to provide me with a basis for ministry to others through my testimony..

I was given the opportunity to go on several mission trips with my church’s youth group throughout middle and high school, the first of which was to a Hispanic community in Atlanta, Georgia. Every day for a week, we met between apartment buildings to have Bible school with a group of children who all spoke very little English. To my amazement, the language barrier wasn’t a problem for us; the love of Christ was enough to overcome any obstacle that separated us. This realization changed my perspective of life and faith, and it gave me the desire to continue seeking out mission trips in order to serve the Lord and reach out to other peoples.  In high school, I participated in a mission trip in the Appalachian Mountains each summer. Each summer, I helped lead Bible studies, worship, and skits with my peers. It was amazing for me to see how much the Holy Spirit could do through a group of young people. Spending time and growing with children and youth who desired to feel Christ in their lives brought joy to my life because of the way in which God was using us all to be a blessing to each other.

Since beginning college, I have continued seeking our opportunities to share the love and message of Christ with others on my college campus and around the world. In college, I have been active in campus ministries.  Over the years, my involvement grew from participation into leadership. In my sophomore year, I led a small group based on Lee Strobel’s The Case for Christ. The next two years, I was in charge of planning, organizing and implementing all of the small groups on campus as the Director of Student Growth on the Campus Ministries Leadership Council.  I also became a worship leader for our contemporary worship service, and in the final semester of my senior year, I have been given the opportunity to serve my campus as a student chaplain. I have been blessed to see my college’s campus ministry grow immensely over the past four years and I pray that the Holy Spirit will continue work on the campus. With my college, I served on missions to Panama, South America and Ecuador. On these trips, I was able to use my love for construction work and building relationships for God’s glory. I was also blessed to have the opportunity to serve on several mission teams with my parent’s church. I spent two weeks in Beijing, China after my freshman year. During this time, I worked with university students teaching English and building relationships with each of them. This was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. The students’ passion for Christ and desire to continue learning more about the gospel was so inspiring to me. It is so incredible to meet with the people who make up the persecuted Church and learn about the amazing things they encounter and the ways they are able to see God working in their lives. I was able to return to Beijing a year later to spend more time with some of the same students and several more from other universities in the area. Once again, I fell in love with the people and their passion for the Lord.

I was recently given the opportunity to serve for one year as an intern with the youth ministry at First United Methodist Church in Montgomery, Alabama, a youth ministry that had been through a lot of different youth ministers in a short period of time. I felt it was my opportunity to be the stable role model that the youth need in their spiritual lives. My position as an intern involved planning, implementing, and supporting Bible studies and events within the youth group.  Over the course of the year, I gained a better understanding of ministry, especially geared toward young people. One of my favorite parts of the internship was getting to know each of the youth better by serving alongside them on their summer mission trips to Savannah, Georgia and Hinton, North Carolina. On both of the trips, we spent a week helping local missions projects in feeding the hungry, painting and repairing homes, and even framing new homes for underprivileged families. The relationships we built within the youth group are some that I hope will last well into their adult lives.  

            My understanding of ministry has certainly grown a lot through college because of my leadership in campus ministries as well as my religion classes. My heart breaks for those who are persecuted, but they remind me that as followers of Christ, we are called to persecution in His name. I believe that if we are not being persecuted for our faith, we are not doing a good enough job living radically different than the people around us. Christ was constantly being persecuted for His actions when He loved and spent time with those people who were thought to be inferior. The ideas most American Christians consider to be radical today are generally straight from Jesus’ mouth. Giving everything away, taking up our own cross, and hating people in comparison to the love we have for Christ is not just what new age, “red letter” Christians are called to do, it is what Jesus told all of us to do if we wanted to truly follow Him and be considered His disciples.

            In furthering my education in the MA program at Asbury Theological Seminary, I hope to better prepare myself for the life of ministry that I believe I am being called to. Being able to build relationships with a foundation in ministry has been a blessing to me, but I hope to be able to adequately share the Gospel with others so that evangelism is heard around the world.

My Personal History....

The  following is for my application to seminary. The five points are what they ask for perspective students to discuss in the paper. I need your input, critique, and words of wisdom...please. 

 

·  Discuss your relationship to Christ and your spiritual pilgrimage.

·  Discuss your motivation for preparing for ministry

·  Reflect on your understanding of Christian ministry

·  Describe your recent vocational experiences

·  Discuss your experience in Christian ministry and any other relevant experiences

Having grown up in a Christian home, I have been surrounded by Christian family for most of my life; however, it was not until later in adolescence that I discovered the true importance of Christ in my life. Growing up, my parents and older brother were my constant encouragement and solid foundation from which my understanding of Christianity grew. I have known from a young age that God is my creator and sustainer and that through Him anything is possible. I was active in youth groups, church choirs, vacation Bible schools, and church retreats; I always felt these things fed my soul and taught me more about my faith and the Christian community we find in the body of Christ. 

 During middle school, I was diagnosed with clinical depression. This depression separated me from feeling the love of Christ, as well as those around me. My poor self image and feelings of lack of control over my life led me to feelings of anxiety and self-mutilation. It was only through regular encounters with friends in the Church that I was able to see that I am a unique part of God’s creation and He loves me as His child. I learned that Christ is my strength and my foundation; and, through Him, anything is possible. This part of my testimony is one that God has used continuously in my life to connect me with my brothers and sisters who are hurting or struggling through hardships like my own. Although it was a difficult time in my life, I have grown from it and become stronger in my faith because of it. 

I was given the opportunity to go on several mission trips with my church’s youth group throughout middle and high school, the first of which was to a Hispanic community in Atlanta, Georgia. Every day for a week, we met between apartment buildings to have Bible school with a group of children who all spoke very little English. To my amazement, the language barrier wasn’t a problem for us; the love of Christ was enough to overcome any obstacle that separated us. This realization changed my perspective of life and faith, and it gave me the desire to continue seeking out mission trips in order to serve the Lord and reach out to other peoples.  In high school, I participated in a mission trip in the Appalachian Mountains each summer. Each summer, I helped lead Bible studies, worship, and skits with my peers. It was amazing for me to see how much the Holy Spirit could do through a group of young people. Spending time and growing with children and youth who desired to feel Christ in their lives brought joy to my life because I knew I was being blessed to be a blessing to each of them.

Since beginning college, I have continued seeking our opportunities to share the love and message of Christ with others on my college campus and around the world. In college, I have been active in campus ministries.  Over the years, my involvement grew from participation into leadership. In my sophomore year, I led a small group based on Lee Strobel’s The Case for Christ. The next two years, I was in charge of planning, organizing and implementing all of the small groups on campus as the Director of Student Growth on the Campus Ministries Leadership Council.  I also became a worship leader for our contemporary worship service, and in the final semester of my senior year, I have been given the opportunity to serve my campus as a student chaplain. I have been blessed to see my college’s campus ministry grow immensely over the past four years and I pray that the Holy Spirit will continue work on the campus. With my college, I served on missions to Panama, South America and Ecuador. On these trips, I was able to use my love for construction work and building relationships for God’s glory. I was also blessed to have the opportunity to serve on several mission teams throughout college. My freshman year, I spent two weeks in Beijing, China with university students teaching English and building relationships with each of them. This was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. The students’ passion for Christ and desire to continue learning more about the gospel was so inspiring to me. It is so incredible to meet with the people who make up the persecuted Church and learn about the amazing things they encounter and the ways they are able to see God working in their lives. I was able to return to Beijing a year later to spend more time with some of the same students and several more from other universities in the area. Once again, I fell in love with the people and their passion for the Lord. 

I was recently given the opportunity to serve for one year as an intern with the youth ministry at First United Methodist Church in Montgomery, Alabama. My position as an intern involved planning, implementing, and supporting Bible studies and events within the youth group.  Over the course of the internship, I was able to gain a better understanding of ministry, especially geared toward young people. I was also able to participate in mission trips to Savannah, Georgia and Hinton, North Carolina. 

 My understanding of ministry has certainly grown a lot through college because of my leadership in campus ministries as well as my religion and ministry classes. My heart breaks for those who are persecuted, but it reminds me that as followers of Christ, we are called to persecution in His name. I believe that if we are not being persecuted for our faith, we are not doing a good enough job living radically different than the people around us. Christ was constantly being persecuted for His actions when He loved and spent time with those people who were thought to be inferior. The ideas most American Christians consider to be radical today are generally straight from Jesus’ mouth. Giving everything away, taking up our own cross, and hating people in comparison to the love we have for Christ is not just what new age, “red letter” Christians are called to do, it is what Jesus told all of us to do if we wanted to truly follow Him and be considered His disciples.

 

You Won't Relent- Misty Edwards

travels...

Tonight was the first meeting of my travel class for Greece and Turkey and I could not be more excited to get this semester over with so that I we can go.

I love traveling. I love new cultures. I love meeting new people and seeing how they live. I love living out of a suitcase with just the bare essentials. I love that I get to do all of these things with a group of some of my favorite people.
I've never really done anything like this before. This trip is my first true vacation out of the country. I've been to Mexico, Panama, Ecuador, and China, but I've never gone just to learn and explore. I have a feeling that God is going to teach me a lot about myself along the way.

This class is huge. Ok, it's not huge, but it's a lot bigger than I would have liked it to be. My peers are an interesting mix of sects from around campus. Sorority girls, the opposing sorority's girls, some odd ball people with  a few friends, and the kids from the religion department. I'm in the ladder group; we sit up front. The class is called, "in the footsteps of Paul." As you can probably imagine, we're going to be following Paul on his mission around Greece and Turkey.

Today begins our journey of following Paul to discover ancient Greece in Biblical times. I pray that God guide us through this learning process and protect us on the amazing trip ahead of us.

Proverbs

A little wisdom from Solomon that caught my eye in my reading...

11:22 Like a golden ring in a pigs snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion

15:33 The fear of the Lord teaches a man wisdom and humility comes before honor

18:15 The heart of the discerning acquires knowledge, the ears of the wise seek it out

27:5 Better is open rebuke than hidden love

dream a dream

It's 1am and I can't sleep, so I decided to write. I've been having several bad dreams every night for the past week, and I think I might just be anxious about sleeping at this point.

I think it's about time I updated  my blog on what God is doing in my life right now, what better time than now?!


I have been given the opportunity to serve my campus as a student chaplain. The title holds a lot of responsibility, but I am so pumped to have been chosen for it. I am excited to see what God has in store for all of us at HC.

As for after graduation...there's a lot going on!! I will officially have a BA in psychology and religion as of May 7th. That week, I will be moving out of my apartment and packing for an amazing trip to Greece and Turkey! When I get back from that trip, I will be moving to the west side of Montgomery for nine weeks to serve as a resident missionary with Common Ground Montgomery and House to House.

Honestly, I was a bit apprehensive about the summer resident missionary thing...but now I really feel like this is where God is telling me to be. I truly believe that He is going to use me in great ways this summer for His glory! For the next few months, I will be working hard to raise enough prayer and financial support for the summer. $2500 and lots of prayer will allow me to live and serve in the community as I help restore homes, provide new homes, and witness to neighbors.
I plan to use my blog as a way to keep my supporters up to date on everything happening in my life, especially as God prepares my heart for His ministry in bigger and greater ways than I can imagine.
So, I'm taking the first steps into my future after undergrad...into a life fully devoted to Christ and the Good News.

My prayer tonight is that God would calm my heart and prepare it for everything He has for me. I pray that people around me would see Him through me, and that He would constantly be glorified in me.

a little wisdom...

In my wisdom and poetic literature class, we talked the other day about what our society considers to be wisdom. It seems that things like cliches and song lyrics are becoming more widely accepted as wisdom. "Everything happens for a reason." It's one of the most cliche statements anyone could make after something bad or unexpected happens. (no, that's not my wisdom for you) As a Christian in our society, it's hard to see when we are accepting worldly explanations or "wisdom" over those of scripture. Sure, this statement sounds good enough, a Calvinist might even try to support it with Romans 8:28. It isn't so much the statement that is bothersome, its the usual attitude and meaning that inspires it. You might say it after you bomb a big test, sleep in and miss an important meeting, or accidentally hurt someone you care about. Saying, "Everything happens for a reason," is like writing off your sin; like saying it was bad, but it was ok because something else will come of it.If you are a Christian and you believe that Christ suffered and died for your sins, you probably don't think they are ok. God has a plan for us, yes! Everything happens according to His will. Sin is not in His will for us. Sin separates us from Him.
I think instead of using cliche statements to explain away worldly situations, we should focus on God and His desires for us. Repent, seek Him, and fear Him.

here & now

There's nothing like a weekend packed full of youth, sugar, and Jesus to make you think about the life you've been given. I know that the Holy Spirit was moving in that place. I was a small group leader, and I know that I got a lot out of it. I hope the youth did too.


My thoughts are scattered still, but I thought you should know them...

1. I have focused so much on where God is taking me and what the future holds that I have neglected the present.  God doesn't just have a plan for me, He is currently working in me. RIGHT NOW. What am I doing for Him every day of my life? living for Him.

2. If there aren't things in your life that you couldn't do without Him, you aren't living it right. My friend, Woods, showed me this. Sometimes there are things are already know, but you just have to be told for them to stick. We are called to be crazy, radical and in love with Christ. When did we stop? We need to get back on it...if Christ is our example, we are failing!

3. I have a passion for lots of things: music (singing specifically), organizing (not so much leading), work (like construction), and water (everyone deserves fresh, clean water every day without having to walk miles to get it.

4. I want to sell everything I own. I want to fully devote myself to Him. I want to rely on Him for everything. I want to be a blessing to other people so that I can bring the gospel to the nations.

5. I LOVE YOU. uh huh, you.

Pain

A friend of mine wrote a poem for me a few weeks go. He thought I should share it...so here it is:

When the weight of the world seems too much,
When you long for someone's gentle touch,
Call on the One who calms the storm,
To keep your heart safe and warm.

When life seems too tough,
When you don't think you're strong enough,
Cry out to Him who is always close to touch
To keep you from hurting way too much.

There's something about that name,
It carries all the fame.
There's more to Him,
he makes life less grim.

He stands with you in the rain.
He took all your hurt and pain.
He carries you as far as east to west,
He will never need to rest.

Christ is the One,
He has truly won
Christ hears your cries
Yet He sees through all your lies.