God is great, God is good...

Last night, I spent the night with Family Promise (back home we called it Interfaith Hospitality Network) and two families going through hard times, greatly effected by the economy, no doubt. This isn't the first time I've helped out; my dad and I have been hosting with families since I was in middle school. It's something that not a lot of people are willing to do, but it takes absolutely no effort. I think, honestly, it does more good for me than it does the families. They just need someone there in case something happens. In January, the mother we stayed with went into labor the day we stayed with them. She's still in the program and the baby is doing well.

Being there made me realize how much I overlook the little things that I have to be grateful for. I have the world's greatest parents and I can't imagine who I would be without them in my life. My mom has taught me to be a strong, hard working woman. She's never had only one job and she's never complained; she's always been active in my life, and I know she will always be there to support me. Aside from being full of creative pneumonic devices for the muscles of the body and for Hebrew vocabulary, my dad has taught me what real faith looks like. My parents have shaped me into the best combination of the two of them; I am so grateful for everything that they have done for me.

I have been so incredibly blessed. My desire for my life is not only to share my blessings with others, but to help other people see just how blessed they are. We take so much for granted; I just want to see the little things and recognize how great God is to care about me so much that those little things even exist.

Crowned

This weekend, I'm taking a group of girls to an event at the Basement in Birmingham called Crowned. I am so excited for this event. I think this past weekend has helped tremendously to prepare my heart for the evening of worship.

My God is Lord and King of everything, and I am His daughter, heir to His Kingdom. I am a princess, and as a princess I have the privilege and obligation to honor and serve the King.

"I'm not afraid..."

At a retreat this past weekend, I learned something that really changed the way I think about some things. One of those things is my fear of dolphins.
I love metaphors. This is one I really enjoyed in the moment.
A woman, April, was speaking about how we shouldn't be chained to this world, instead we should be chained to Christ. Dolphins live in the ocean. They eat and sleep and live in the water, but they breathe air. They get their real life from breathing air outside of the world they live in under water. We breathe in the Kingdom; we get our life from God rather than the things of this world.

Another speaker also talked a little bit about fear. She said that we shouldn't be afraid of anything because fearing something more than we fear God is a sin. Then again, "if you live your life too safely, you will never know the thrill of God working through you."

A song I've been singing a lot lately has been on my heart regarding this subject. "Show Me Your Glory" by Jesus Culture:

I see the cloud, I step in
I want to see Your glory as Moses did
Flashes of light, rolls of thunder

I’m not afraid, I’m not afraid

Show me Your glory, show me Your glory
Show me Your glory, show me Your glory

I’m awed by Your beauty, lost in Your eyes
I want to walk in Your presence like Jesus did
Your glory surrounds me and I’m overwhelmed

I long to look on the face of the One that I love
Long to stay; in Your presence is where I belong

Work, Wedding Dresses, and Gratefulness

I wrote a really long post the other day and forgot to actually post it when I was done, so this is the cliff notes version of the past several days.....as I write, I'm listening to pandora; if you want some good music, make a station for Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros.

Saturday, I worked at my old job 4pm to 11:30. It was the busiest day so far this year and it was so much fun. I didn't get to bake, but I did clean out the ice cream machine because they had dyed the vanilla ice cream green for St.Patty's Day. I really enjoyed being back there for the weekend.
I love being busy. I think that is why despite going a little crazy before, working 30 hours with 16 hours of classes and all my campus ministries stuff was great for me because I stayed busy.

Sunday, I drove to Birmingham to go to the Church at Brook Hills with Jackie and her fiance, John. David Platt is in India on a mission trip, so I didn't get to hear him preach, but it was a really great service anyway. Jackie and I had lunch with her mom, sisters, and nieces before we went to David's Bridal to look for wedding dresses.
Looking for wedding dresses makes it real. It means my roommate and best friend is getting married. Seeing her try on dresses was a bitter sweet moment for me. I am so happy to be a part of all of this with her, as her maid of honor. I couldn't believe it, but she found her dress, it was actually the first one she put on. She looked beautiful in it and I can wait to see her walk down the isle. We looked through bridesmaids dresses and only picked a color. I've been researching my duties as the maid of honor and I am getting more and more excited for the big day to get here.
It has also gotten me thinking about my own wedding that might eventually happen some day...thinking about bridesmaids, colors, dresses and the little details. I have decided that I want to have a Jewish processional; that means the groom will walk down the isle with his parents, then I will with my parents. Then the groom's family will offer a cup of wine as a "proposal" of the covenant between families. I think incorporating both families reminds us that it's not just about the bride and groom. I've also decided that I like green and black, with a little plum. As for the dress, I think I would go really simple, but elegant. I guess we'll see when the day comes.

Monday, I ended up watching a marathon of Pretty Little Liars while doing pilates to the DVD I stole from Jackie's room. (I was watching the DVD on my computer in front of the tv). I was supposed to hang out with my mom in the afternoon, but she got busy at work, so I ended up spending the night at my parents house that night after watching the movie It's Kind of a Funny Story with them.

Tuesday, I had a dentist appointment early in the morning. It went really well. Apparently I have good teeth, except that one I had a root canal on... : )
I rewarded myself for the good visit by getting lunch at Scott Street Deli, my favorite place for lunch during the week. If you haven't been, go now. Get a chicken salad sandwich on homemade bread, you wont regret it. I ate my sandwich at ASF by the lake. It was nice to read and take in the sun.

I went to my mom's water aerobics class at the YMCA that night and ate dinner with my parents at Earth Fare. Dad had fried chicken, corn and beans; mom had a fruit topped salad. I had spring rolls and california rolls with real crab. yuuummmmm. For desert we went to Nancy's for italian ice! I concluded the day by falling asleep on the couch to the food network.

So what am I thankful for? I'm thankful for a job and things to do. I'm thankful for friends and fellowship that comes with planning a wedding. I'm thankful for my parents and the little things they do for me that mean a lot to me. I'm thankful for a beautiful day to take in some vitamin D. I'm thankful for a friend who is willing to be my accountability partner.
 

Day 4: Rest

I love getting enough sleep that I wake up with a great attitude, ready to take on the world. I have so many things I want to get done today, but I'm excited to get everything off my "to do" list before next week.
Today is also the beginning of spring break and I am thankful for the week that I have to rest, teach myself Hebrew, and organize my life. I also plan to take a nap in the sun at least once a day for the week. And so, it begins. Hurray for rest and relaxing.

day 3: campus ministries

Yesterday was an amazing day. Not only was it beautiful outside, but my classes were short, giving me more time to be outside and to hang out with my friends. The crowd at Emerge was a lot smaller than usual, with Spring Break next week, but it was still an awesome night. Wednesday night we had one of the best practices ever with the band, and the music just worked. Josh led "Solution" and the song he wrote, "Spirit Reign." Edgar led "From the Inside Out." I led "None but Jesus." And Megan led "All Consuming Fire." It was pretty awesome.
We decided to have communion at what was pretty much the last minute, but thankfully we have Brian Smith who was willing to be there to bless the elements for us and serve it. We are so blessed to be a part of such an amazing group. Our campus ministries has grown so much and I am so glad that I have been a part of such an awesome growth and transformation; I just pray that it continues to make changes for the better.
After Emerge, we had fellowship at IHOP (the pancake one, not the prayer one). It was so much fun. Its moments like those that are so special to me. I love just enjoying a meal with my brothers and sisters after a great night of worship.
God is good.

Day 2: Nature

I am thankful for weather and nature.

Today was perfectly beautiful. My professor let us have class outside to do some group work; my group sat in the middle of the green, which hadn't been mowed yet, so it was covered in little yellow and white flowers. Being a flower child, I couldn't just sit there without making a crown of flowers, so I made one for everyone in my group, which was pretty awesome, because the two guys in my group even wore them.

After classes, it was still beautiful, so I studied Hebrew with Alyce in the sun. I love sitting on the porch of the Hut because so many people pass by and it just makes me feel like I'm a part of a huge, loving family. 

I love it.

Tonight after Emerge practice, Stephen and I went out to Pike Road and looked at the stars. The moon was really bright and the sky was beautiful. With the cows, geese and coyotes around, it was pretty perfect. I'd have to say it was the best conclusion to a rather amazing day.

Gratitude Challenge: Day 1

Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, 

for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.    1 Thessalonian’s 5:16-18

Even on the Cross, Christ had every right to talk bad about everyone who put him there but instead he shows grace and mercy to the man next to him. 
So partake in the suffering of Christ by not accepting that life is not fair. Accept that there are things that are out of your control and instead of complaining to every one who will listen trust that God is in control.

I have decided to take on this challenge. Every day I will write about something that I am grateful for in my life. I hope that by making an effort to be more actively grateful I will assume a more positive, thankful attitude for all of the blessings and situations in my life.

There's no better time to begin than the present:
I am grateful for my professors. It sounds kind of cheesy, but it's really true. I have been blessed to be a part of a college whose faculty are among some of the most incredible educators, not only for their devotion to teaching, but for their hearts for myself and my peers. This morning, like other Tuesday and Thursday mornings, I sat in on a lesson in one of my professor's offices with my friend, Alyce. Dr. Eggleston, my Hebrew professor, was going over a lesson from my Hebrew class that I hadn't done well on before. He knew that I was struggling, and he wanted to help me see the bigger picture for the things we had been learning. This evening, I had dinner with a group of peers, two professors, and their families at a local Greek restaurant. I am a part of a group who will be traveling to Greece and Turkey in May, so our professors, Dr. Borders and Dr. Jeffcoat, met us for a taste of true Greek food and fellowship. It's little things like this that make me so thankful to be a part of the community that we share at Huntingdon. The relationships and guidance that I have gotten in the past four years have really been the best part of my education; without my professors supporting me and helping me along the way, I don't think I could have ever been a double major, much less be heading off to seminary in the fall. 

Dear Reader,

It's Tuesday, the first one of the season of Lent, and I thought I would take this time to thank you. Once upon a time, I was a little girl growing up in the suburbs of Charlotte; your average child by day, and journaling fanatic by night (or at least evening). My journals filled my book shelve; I even titled them as to keep them organized. I thought one day I would be a great writer or editor for books and articles on topics I love like music and concerts or psychology and religion. Although that dream has passed, I still feel like I get to live a bit of it through my blogs. It's because of readers, like you, (who either care about me enough to want to read this or are simply bored and looking for something entertaining to read) that I feel accomplished after sharing my thoughts. My goal is not always the same when I sit down to write what on my mind; whether its meant to be thought provoking, emotional or entertaining, ultimately, it's for you. My best friend, Stephen, once called it "my humble musings to the world," and that's what I hope they are.
So, all of that to say...thank you. Thank you for reading, for caring, or for being bored enough to seek amusement in this blog.

I hope you'll take a moment today to stop and be grateful for something.

What is sin?

In the Bible study I go to on Wednesday nights, we've been talking about sin and I wanted to share some of what we've talked about. The group made a working definition for what we believe sin to be:

Sin is a willful or unwillful act or state of being which is inherent in humanity that distances us from God, neighbor and environment; which God is forgiving, and healing in conjunction with humanity through the mystery of grace in Jesus Christ.

In my education, I have been taught that sin is simply separation from God. This doesn't really tell us everything that sin is and can be. We continued our discussion last night on corporate sin. There is this cycle of sin that occurs between the individual and the institution of the Church. It's the chicken and the egg situation. "Self perpetuating sin." So how do we end this cycle of sin? Take out the institution? We would just replace that institution with another.Some possibilities for solutions:
1. Separation: separate the institution. (only, we can't because we end up replacing with something else [another institution], so it's not very helpful to us)
2. Liberal: Change the instution? (only, we probably can't do this)
3. Conservation: create individuals who are as good as they can possibly be in order to keep the cycle from continuing to the institution (no matter how good a bible study is, it doesn't mean people will change)
4. God.

He's our only hope. It sounds cliche but it's the truth: Our only hope for overcoming sin is God.

Assessment Day Rain

Yesterday was assessment day for Huntingdon College. All of the seniors have tests for their major(s) and the underclassmen have surveys about their college experience. It was the perfect day, or so it seems, to be stuck inside doing 4 hours worth of tests. I learned after completing my religion exam that it apparently hasn't been changed in 17 years, and they aren't teaching the same classes they taught 17 years ago. Also, they don't even grade the stupid thing....um, can someone please tell me why we all wasted our time?! My psychology exam was at 1:30, so Brittney and I walked around in the rain until we decided we were hungry enough to leave. The picture above is Brittney "diving" into the pool that we generally use as a walkway when it isn't flooding out. You can't really tell from the picture, but it gets pretty deep...We ate lunch at the Green Papaya, delicious Tai food! Then we hurried off for round two of assessments. Psychology's exam was not made by our professors, it was a sealed standardized test...and it kicked our butts. The school rewards us for wasting our time by giving us all chocolate bars and a free ticket to a movie at the Rave. It was almost worth it.

I went to see Rango that afternoon. It is a pretty cute movie. I love when animated movies make the animals look like their human voice...like Johny Depp as a lizard. It was quite funny. I also love when kids movies get a little slip of propaganda in them, like Wallie with the environment, this was about controlling water. "When you control the water, you control everything." You should go see it.

Brother

I'm the baby in my family. I have an older brother, Cameron. A lot of people who have known me since I moved to Alabama don't know that about me because he still lives in my hometown in South Carolina.
My relationship with my brother has evolved a lot over the years, but one thing that has never changed is that he is the one person I have always sought approval from. Even when I was little, I wanted him to think I was cool. We fought a lot when we were little, mostly about really petty things like who had control over the remote for the tv, but the year my family moved to Alabama, our relationship changed. My brother was starting his senior year of high school and I was only going into 10th grade. Because the schools in South Carolina are a bit more advanced than Alabama's, Cameron stayed in Rock Hill to finish up high school there, while my parents and I moved to Montgomery.
That year, my brother came to Montgomery for my birthday and brought along my best friend, Ally. It was the best birthday surprise I could ever imagine...See, my birthday is April 29th and my brother's birthday is April 30th! Spending our birthdays together was an amazing birthday present after spending that year apart. I never really believed the saying that distance makes the heart grow fonder, but that year, I learned it's true. (While I'm being cliche...)  You never know how much something, or someone, means to you until you don't have them anymore.
My brother told me that us moving to Montgomery ruined a lot of his ideas about that year. He had been looking forward to being able to drive me to school everyday, and even teaching me how to drive. He was disappointed that we missed that opportunity, but even more than that, I couldn't even imagine going through my senior year without my family with me. I think that year forced us both to grow up a good bit.
Cameron spent the next year in Montgomery, working at Starbucks and taking amazing pictures, until he left on a mission trip to Bulgaria. The night before he left, I had one of the worst dreams of my life...but the funny thing was that in the end, after mass genocide and gas chambers, my brother made a comment in my dream that made me confident that everything was going to be ok. There was a bus, in my dream, that hovered like some kind of space craft. Cameron simply said that it, the things happening in my dream, wasn't possible because the weight of the bus with people in it and the amount of power that it would take to keep it hovering off the ground at the speed it was going just wouldn't work. That's my brother.
My brother went from the person I sought approval from to being a role model for me. Cameron has a heart for people. He has an artist's eye that sees the most beautiful things in even the most horrible situations. I learned that after his first trip to China. Seeing is photos made me feel something for the Chinese people that I hadn't felt before. I wanted to meet them and love them.
In 2008, my entire family had the opportunity to travel to China. It was the year of the Beijing Olympics, and we all got to go to an event, but that was nothing compared to the time we spent with the students there. The year after that, my brother and I got to go back to China to spend more time with university students. They have such a desire to learn and grow together. They were so incredibly inspiring to me; I will never forget them.
This past year, Cameron graduated from Winthrop University with a BA in Art with a concentration in photography. Everyone was there to celebrate at the little house he rented with three of his friends. I had just turned 21 and he was excited to educate me in the world of alcohol, but the coolest part to me wasn't throwing the party for him, but the way the community of people who love him came together just to honor him. I loved it. He completely deserved it.
Cameron's friends have this amazing kind of community that I admire and desire so much for myself and my friends here. It's this community of incredibly gifted artists who now work together in a studio called Space 157. Even before the studio, they had the Friday Arts Project. These artists don't just work with each other, they live together (not literally). They share food and fellowship as often as they can and they celebrate every moment they have together. For me, they have been the embodiment of Christ in the way they share community and love with each other. This week, my brother and his friends are in New York City for the I AM conference...the city is filled with Christian artists and I love that my brother has gotten to be a part of it.
My brother and I have been through a lot together over the past 22 years. I was his worst birthday present back in 1989, but I think only good things have come from having such a smart, artistic and loving big brother. I can't imagine my life without him.

我爱你哥哥

Photojournalism and Opposites

This photo earned me an A in my photojournalism project. I love the trees and the way the sun light is filtered through the leaves. I think sometimes I just get lucky when I take a good picture. I hope my luck continues for this class.

Our new assignment is opposites. I took this picture in java city yesterday kind of as a joke. I have other ideas for pictures, but I'm not sure how I am going to go about taking them. My one critique that I've been getting is to make sure my subject of focus in the picture isn't dead center. (thus the splenda packet)

The green is covered with tons of tiny little yellow and white flowers. Jackie and I sat in the swing out there yesterday between classes. It's hard to imagine that in a couple months we'll be out there walking across the stage at graduation. The moment seems bitter sweet.